Is your Husband or Wife Not Supportive in your MLM Business?
Before we dive in, I just want to make it clear… I’m no relationship Goo-Roo.
I’m divorced so taking relationship advice from me might be like learning how to get six pack abs from a sumo wrestler.
I typically don’t train on things I’m not an expert at. So while I’m no expert in relationships, I am an expert in human nature. I’ve coached thousands of entrepreneurs over my 25 year career and this has been one that I’ve been able to coach many others through.
Many of you reading this may not have this issue or may not even be in a relationship… but it’s important for you to read this because on your journey to leadership, this WILL be an issue for the people you lead.
My training here is assuming you’re in a very committed and serious relationship… either married or headed in that direction.
If you’re just semi-serious and have a spouse who doesn’t support you, the old saying “change your spouse, or change your spouse” might be applicable. If you aren’t getting supported now when it’s not serious, it will likely get worse when you are serious.
7 Ways to Deal with an Unsupportive Spouse in Business
#1 – Don’t push.
Are you pressuring and pushing your spouse to be as excited about your business as you are?
I know your first instinct is to say, “no of course not.”
But if I were to ask your spouse if they’re feeling pressured, what would they say?
If you suspect there is even a slight hint of this, I’d recommend you ask them and get their perspective. If you want them to understand your dreams and desires in business, follow the sage wisdom of Dr. Stephen Covey, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”
The more you push, the more likely you’ll create conflict. Some people aren’t wired for entrepreneurship, or at least don’t believe they are because of their beliefs. Instead of pressuring them to be excited, you do you and let them be them.
If you want your spouse to support your dreams and desires, understand their dreams and desires and support them. Even if you can’t understand theirs the same way they may not be able to understand yours.
#2 – If you want support, give support.
In what ways are you giving support in the ways that your spouse wants the most?
Notice I said “in the ways that your spouse wants”.
You may be providing money… a home… cooking… cleaning… etc. Those may be important for you, but in many cases, spouses aren’t supportive because they don’t feel supported in the ways that matter most to them.
How can you BE the example for support that you want? The answer may not be obvious to you so you may need to dig in, ask and stay in that question until you find the answer.
To sum it up, you should be the example.
#3 – Neutralize the threat
In so many cases, an unsupportive spouse is unsupportive because they feel like your business is a threat to your relationship. They may feel like your business is a bigger priority than the relationship and that your business is pulling you away from them.
Understand this threat may not be vocalized because your spouse doesn’t want to appear insecure or controlling but the reason they are not supportive very well may be because of their fear and insecurity.
For many entrepreneurs, this is hard to understand because in your mind, you’re “doing the business for them” or for the family and you’ve told them that. Realize that even though that might be true for you, and even though you’ve told them that time and time again, they don’t feel it.
How do you get them to feel it? Keep reading…
#4 – Honor them
Find ways to admire and acknowledge what you honor and respect about your spouse.
Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have a desire to be respected. If your spouse feels like you’re respecting your business or your business partners more than them, it will drive a wedge between the two of you.
If you want to be supported and honored as an entrepreneur, support and honor your spouse and a man or woman.
#5 – Appreciate them
On a daily, yes DAILY basis, ensure that your spouse feels truly appreciated. It may be great to tell them, but we see better than we hear… make it a practice of writing little letters of appreciation. Even if it’s just a sticky note, it shows that you care and causes them to be appreciated and loved.
When you’re out working on your business, take a few minutes and send them a text message appreciating and acknowledging them. I’ve seen relationships transform through the simple act of an appreciating text or sticky note written every single day.
If you feel like you’ve tried everything, write a text or a note every single day for the next 30 days and see what happens.
Reward the behaviors you want.
When your spouse shows any sign of support, go overboard in appreciating that support.
#6 – Unconditional love
What we all want in our heart is unconditional love. To be loved no matter what.
When your spouse is unsupportive, understand that it’s likely because of their fears, their lack of feeling supported, their lack of feeling honored, appreciated or loved. So love them no matter what.
If you want them to support you whether you are winning or not, love them whether they are showing up as loving or not.
Ensure that your spouse understands that they are the most important thing in your life and love them no matter what.
#7 – SUCCEED!
I’ve seen hundreds of spouses go from unsupportive to their spouses biggest fan when they see their spouse win.
There’s an old story from Tom “Big Al” Schreiter that fits here…
A husband gets involved in network marketing. He’s super excited and has a dream of buying a new Cadillac. He cuts out a picture of a Cadillac and tapes it to their bathroom mirror. But when he gets home that night from work and doing meetings, his unsupportive wife takes the picture down and puts it in the drawer.
But undeterred, the husband tapes it back up on the mirror and when he comes home the next night, again it’s in the drawer.
This process repeats every day for months.
Until one day, the husband comes home with a brand new Cadillac earned from the profits of his new business.
The next day when the husband comes home, taped to their bathroom mirror is a picture of a mink coat! 🙂
Your spouse wants to see you win. They just may not believe it’s possible.
So do the things necessary to win. Over the last 25 years, I’ve helped thousands of entrepreneurs become successful in business. I don’t care what your background is, what your experience is, or how bad you might be right now.
You can win if you’ll get the training and mentorship and simply go out and do the work.
If you’re serious about CRUSHING IT in Network Marketing, the biggest value I can provide for you is in my 7 week video coaching program called M-School.
This is my blueprint for mastering the 7 key skills in network marketing. It will blow your mind because I cut through the fluff and tell you exactly what to do to crush it.
Simply put, there is no more powerful training in network marketing.
This training is why I’ve never not become the #1 income earner in the 3 companies I’ve been involved in over the past 20 years. When you learn what I know, you can’t help but make more money. So if you’re ready to make a LOT more money, come spend the next 7 weeks with me.
Hop over to https://www.overcometheobjection.com/coaching-7-weeks to get all the details…
Let’s do BIG things!
Matt Morris
Top Network Marketing Speaker and Trainer
You may also READ our previous blog post about “How to Be a Great Leader in Network Marketing”
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